Does anyone wait for marriage anymore

Julianne Hough and Brooks Laich. Sean Lowe and Catherine Giudici. Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey. Kevin Jonas and Danielle Deleasa. Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon. Evan Spiegel and Miranda Kerr. Adriana Lima and Marko Jaric. Tamera Mowry and Adam Housely. DeVon Franklin and Meagan Good. Ali Landry and Alejandro Monteverde. Loading Something is loading. Jan 14, 1. Hey, I am 18 years old and I was wondering if anyone waits to have sex until they marry anymore.

I feel like im the only one doing this and I really want my future wife to be a virgin also. Looking around the world it seems this is a very rare thing and I have been wondering if I will be alone my entire life.

Jan 14, We teamed up with Faith Counseling. Can they help you today? Jan 14, 2. Well, you've got to find other people who share your values. It may make your dating pool smaller, but it is possible. Jan 14, 3. First of all I commend you from my heart. That's a blessing in itself, a testimony, and a gift all wrapped in one. I only wish I had waited, instead of letting that gift from God be wasted on a silly woman that I thought I'd marry who was a whore.

Secondly the pain from it not working like I thought it would, cause me deep depression, and a lot of other destructive relationships. So this is my advice for you friend, go to the Lord in prayer and ask her for that girl that you want to be with.

I can guarantee God has someone out there just for you when the time is right. But continue on building your relationship with Him, trust Him, and believe that He will make it better for you than you could ever imagined.

Be blessed and Shalom. Yes, people do wait and not all of them are overly religious. This is sort of a complicated issue.

On the other hand, I do think that sex tends to be WAY better in a committed relationship or with someone you deeply care about. Refraining from having sex especially when partnered is, in my eyes, fairly unnatural and goes against some very intense biological urges. I personally feel that a religious vow of chastity is a recipe for disaster, in that we pit our brains against an ingrained biological drive.

We may have big, amazing brains, but I would place my money on the biological drive any day. Keep in mind that I mean this in scientific terms, this is not a personal judgement… i. I am trying to think of the reasons for waiting for sex before marriage. There is religion. There is concern for possible pregnancy as a result.

There is sexually transmitted diseases. I did not wait for marriage. I did wait until I was emotionally ready. Until I was mature enough to cope with what could happen. Mature enough to take the proper precautions. Bri — My ex was raised Catholic and originally was waiting until she married. She dated a man for a total of 3 years, eventually they got engaged, then they cracked. She now is no longer religious as she once was, mainly spiritual. She still is not interested in sleeping with people she has little emotional attachment to.

I for one, do beileve that we should wait. Sex was created for marriage by God and was intended to be enjoyed within that boundary. I think you will be glad you did. Not everyone is Christian or shares your religious views, so not everyone is going to share this belief. Whatever happened in the past does to some extent shape us today, but the past is the past. That i why I wear a purity ring on my ring finger. People can say all sorts of religious bs, but that one just does not make sense.

Sex is how we reproduce, it had to come first. Do you think that god would make marriage when there was no reproduction? Of course not. All throughout high school my belief was to wait until marriage to have sex. It hurt that someone wouldnt want me because I wouldnt give it up. Towards the end of my senior year I met an amazing, mature guy.

We got to know eachother, and he respected my beliefs. You know were this is going…when we were together for almost a year and I was 18, and matured I lost it to him. Personally I believe great sex is such an important part of a relationship I could not imagine marrying someone without seeing if we were sexually compatible first.

Sex is pervasive. You cannot escape it! Even the choice to abstain is a sexual decision, whether under a religious mantle or not. Either way, I urge you to watch out for sailors, the dirty buggers.

They go from port to port. Sex is by nature a very risky proposition. With a total stranger sex can be very exhilarating but it is also very dangerous.

In the bounds of a monogamous relationship it is more safe, but safeness can breed complacency. To bring this into the realm of this conversation sex is a gift of sorts. It is the ultimate vulnerability and the gives way to the ultimate acceptance from another person. Does anyone wait till marriage to have sex anymore? Of course, but it takes training from childhood; teaching one to respect what they have sex, potential, morality, honor and not to give it away for the price of a date and a few alcoholic beverages, but to save it, and invest this priceless treasure in a relationship that is worthy and has a good chance of being successful.

Sex seems to be viewed as a inexpensive toy that only adults can play with. It is treated like a game that you can play with anyone, but on the contrary it is a precious, priceless gift that should only be carefully invested, not squandered. The more sex is given out the less it is worth, and the more baggage one acquires, but it is true one gains experience during the process. Does the experience one brings outweigh the baggage? That is something that can only be assessed on a case by case basis, in my experience the baggage creates a negative in the relationship that the sexual experience in not able to overcome.

Hope this helps. If sex is a gift, who is it from? Sex is nature. Sex has no inherent worth, it is worth what it is at the time love, comfort, enjoyment, etc. I got married at 27, and had past partners, but that in no way polluted my experience with my spouse. Sex is a physical act; no need to put sooo much thought into it. All that you carry into the sexual relationship is your experience good or bad, if sex for you is just a physical act.

I know that one can bring all of oneself into sex, and in a sense sex strokes the soul. Sex can be a very shallow act only involving bodies with ones mind and emotions elsewhere. Sex can also be the culmination of our thoughts, feelings, and bodies united in action together in a joint goal. That is the kind of sex one is trying to achieve when one decides to discipline oneself to wait. I appreciate your thoughtful questions.

Who wants their S. To pull back to the question a bit more for a second; the concept of try it before you buy it really flies in the face of what relationships are about, especially marriage.

Dang it…more questions. What is dating? What is cohabitation? Getting a pet together? Meeting the parents? Will this work? Are we really compatible? Sex is another aspect of the relationship that needs to be explored before you tie the knot.

You want to make a good long term investment. Do you hand the money over the the first investment firm that you feel good about? Would you get every scrap of information about them first?

A smart investor would look at every document put out by that company for the life of the company because one wants to make sure that they are picking the right company to invest in. I agree that meeting parents and trying out a relationship are very important first steps to finding out who a person is. There are many others: Premarital counseling to see if you are compatible personality types, watch the person around children, watch the person at church, watch the person first thing in the morning, watch the person before they go to bed, listen to the person, and read what the person writes, read the books the other person reads, discuss politics, find out how the person likes their eggs, watch how the person eats.

I realize that this sounds almost like you are stalking them and that many will find this small list too comprehensive. Now I go back to my previous premise for a moment. Sex is made priceless or significantly cheapened by the amount of times that you give it away. Where will you invest your sex? In a long term relationship that you have test drove in every way but sex?

In the long term cohabitation becomes very similar to marriage after 10 years or so average example and in many states you are considered to be married by law see common law marriage. Marriage is a very fragile relationship these days why make it more fragile by not checking in the most important ways to see if you want to invest yourself sex?

If they accept you sexually without REALLY knowing you does that you give you an indication that they will accept you the same way in all other areas of your relationship? Why not do some checking before you jump in the sack with them? The majority of people have sexual organs. The organs generally work at least that is what I am assuming based on this topic.

Sex works in such a way that just about anyone can do it. The key to consistently good sex is a good relationship. You can certainly talk about sex and whether they have any major complications or not.

Having a good mature, healthy relationship I. Thanks for the asking those insightful questions! Sex is not cheapened, nor does it lose its significance every time you have it.

That would mean even married couples have cheap insignificant sex, since, hopefully, they are having it often. And how do you invest sex? The value of sex exists in the moment one is having it, and no other time. Because when you are not having sex, well your not having it, and thus there is nothing to value. And you can have a mature healthy relationship without being married. Just ask all those couples who have been together forever, and are still not married.

Are their relationships, sexual or otherwise, less significant than those of a married couple? And, since it sounds like you never had pre-marital sex, what do you know about its quality or meaning for others?

I am not taking the bait. I will put more thought into my next response and try to put less words ;. I want to return to them when I get back. If you can put a pickle back in the pickle jar you can have sex. But can you do it well? Can you do it in a way that heightens the electricity and compassion of the relationship? In my mind, the ability for two lovers to be able to have compassionate and exciting sex is key to a lasting, healthy relationship.

Sex is not what we are having a problem with in our society, it is fun and easy to learn. Relationships are the problem i. We have sex down to a science, we have learned a lot from our 20— partners each. Many of us could teach a college class on sexual positions, birth control methods and devices, close calls, and kinky ideas and fill it with practical course ware and the labs would be great. Theoretical situation: A guy marries a girl.

The girl says to the guy that she will do anything sexually that he wants to do. The guys tells her the same thing. The communicate and do exactly as they say. Sometimes the guy is a slow learner, sometimes the girl is a slow learner. They are patient with each other because they understand that they have to learn as they go.

This is ideal. The concepts of sex are not hard to understand. As in this simplified situation; if the relationship is mature and healthy then the sex is the easy part. I would agree that sex is a very important component of any relationship that wants to make it to long term status.

I would just point out that sex in a long term relationship is the result of a the other important qualities unselfishness, patience, communication, fidelity, tenacity, did I say patience already? All you need is two or more willing people. Because if you have an awesome relationship, you are going to have awesome sex. Noraasnave: First of all, another great response. The relationship should be solid before the sex begins, but I think that marriage is an outdated way of defining that boundary.

Hey everyone. Because, to get married is to say that you have great communication and commitment skills… and those are the keys to great sex. Even though you may disagree, if you think about it, it makes sense. Those are the skills one gains by working with multiple partners or as you go.

Curiosity was my reason for asking, but I would also love to talk to anyone about the possibility of staying abstinent. I have waited and plan on waiting until December 20th, ! I made a commitment to Jesus Christ to stay sexually pure. It is an oath that two people take to become committed to each other. God bless you both. Nothing feels as good as staying pure and innocent.

There are a lot of deeds to be done between pure and innocent and intercourse. What exactly is chastity these days? There are many couples out there that have been together for decades, unmarried at least in the eyes of the law , and they have sex. Not to mention I happen to know some straight couples that chose not to marry, but have been together for decades, as well.

Not everyone shares those views and I think many people would disagree. Another point is like what gailcalled said.. My ex was with a guy for 3 years, during which they were waiting to have intercourse until marriage, but they did just about everything else. Some might get pleasure from running or playing sports, singing, playing an instrument, debating, or working with their hands.. We believe God wants us to be happy and satisfied, and that sex celebrates pleasure and our connection to our partner.

It's a difficult and heavy choice to end your marriage, but when you're fighting a losing battle or are feeling trapped and powerless in a relationship that is ultimately causing you harm, don't wait for a single sign to tell you to stay or to leave. When it's time to leave a bad relationship, chances are you'll know—you'll feel it in your gut. If you're still wavering, ask yourself what's still good about your marriage and what isn't, and most importantly, whether the good outweighs the bad.

Learn the best ways to manage stress and negativity in your life. Sternberg RJ, Sternberg K. The New Psychology of Love. Cambridge University Press; The roles of love and happiness in divorce decision making. Bookwala J, Gaugler T. Relationship quality and 5-year mortality risk.

Health Psychology. The association of divorce and extramarital sex in a representative U. Journal of Family Issues. Your Privacy Rights. To change or withdraw your consent choices for VerywellMind. At any time, you can update your settings through the "EU Privacy" link at the bottom of any page.

These choices will be signaled globally to our partners and will not affect browsing data. We and our partners process data to: Actively scan device characteristics for identification. I Accept Show Purposes. Was this page helpful? Thanks for your feedback! Sign Up. What are your concerns? Verywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles.